Both Sides of the Razor
So, Gillette made an advert asking men to be better human
beings, and over one million of them (according to the dislikes on the advert)
lost their minds. Let’s discuss:
Firstly, I would like to state that I am a man (just FYI) and I didn’t find anything wrong with the
video. Sure, it’s a company known for providing shaving cream and razors,
leaving some to argue that it has no business “getting political.” Then again,
neither does a certain orange man using daddy’s money, who has filed for bankruptcy
on his shady business practices more times than I’ve had hot meals.
But I digress.
But I digress.
The point is that many men took issue with this advert,
and when perusing the comments section, I noticed that most of these people
weren’t stating why they were angry, only that they were. Comment after comment
mentions Gillette calling their consumer base trash, but no one seemed to
explain why they thought this advert applied to them. Again, I’m a male, but
this advert didn’t feel like it was attacking me because I didn’t see myself in
the bad behavior—I did, however, see remnants of my youth during the BBQ scene.
The “boys will be boys” slogan that was tossed around whenever someone punched
me on the playground. Other than that? No. I didn’t feel like I was being
dragged through the dirt simply for being a man, so why do over one million men?
Could it be that they see themselves in this advert? Maybe.
Though maybe there’s something else behind it… (Note: This next part just hit me. I didn’t intend for it to take this
turn, but here we go)
Men are victims of abuse. Men can be raped, sexually assaulted,
harassed, threatened, blackmailed (hello, Mr. President), and have all manner
of things done to them that women have started to make noise about. This advert,
while I do believe is incredibly well-intentioned, is something that ignores
those issues that men face, focusing primarily on men as the predators and
enablers of these actions.
Now, can you honestly tell me a movement that has shined
a light on the men that suffer in silence when these things happen to them? And
with that in mind, can you explain to me why the male suicide rate is 3x higher
than that of females in the UK?
There was a recent report that broke out within the
gaming industry that a male employee at Square Enix had been sexually harassed by
a female superior, and upon reporting it was fired from his job, and (allegedly)
told he must’ve “enjoyed it” for him to take months to report the incident (for
fear of losing his job). And, even after having the female admit on tape that
she was fully aware of her actions, he never recovered his position, and she
was simply given a warning.
Imagine if this were a woman. Imagine if this had made
the rounds in the news. Imagine the noise. Imagine the rage. Imagine the
support of thousands of people rallying behind the story. Guess what happened
with this one? Nothing. Only a select few youtubers even dared to report on it,
with most major gaming sites (who do report on female harassment) not giving it
a second look, despite having received the story and evidence.
Now, I want to reiterate that I fully stand behind the Gillette
advert. I think toxic masculinity is disgusting, and I think men need to be
held accountable for their actions. But, having seen the statistics for male suicide,
and having seen the rage behind the comments against the advert, and having heard
the story of a man who was sexually harassed by a woman and saw no justice—despite
so many women coming forward and getting the justice they deserve in recent
years… It left me feeling a little hollow. It made the victory of the advert a
little more bitter.
What is the one thing people tell you about bullies? That
they’re probably being bullied themselves.
The truth is, men aren’t allowed to have emotions. They’ve
never been allowed to have emotions. When women were being told to stay in the kitchen,
men were being dragged to war against their will, and branded cowards if they
didn’t want to fight. When women were told that they couldn’t have a career,
men were forced to feed entire families, and branded failures if they couldn’t.
We have made so much needed progress for women, and it’s
true that no one expects a man to provide an entire family with the needs to survive
these days… but there’s still something not
right with how men’s issues are treated—as if they don’t exist.
I have personally witnessed drunken arguments between
couples get physical several times on the woman’s part, and everyone around
laugh it off. You know when they stop laughing? When the man who has been
slapped several times shoves his “girlfriend” a little too hard and she falls
over. Suddenly, everyone cares. He’s a monster. She should break up with him. She
deserves better. He went too far…
Really?
And I’m not saying this excuses toxic masculinity. I’m
not saying the Gillette advert isn’t needed. I’m not saying every man that behaves
badly must have suffered at the hands of a woman. No. I’m simply stating that
this advert for men decided to focus on men as predators, rather than shine a
light on issues men also face. And if a company for men isn’t going to do it,
who is?
Maybe that’s why some men are angry. Maybe they feel
silenced—more so than ever. Maybe they feel that an advert that could’ve
brought attention to the many issues men currently face—issues that makes them
take their own lives at three times the rate of women, has failed them.
I had almost exactly this same conversation withy family the other day. I haven't looked up the Gillette commercial so haven't seen it but men being abused is a real thing and being raised that they are somehow less than if they have emotions or speak out on abuse they are receiving is insane. I feel everything you wrote so hard, thank you for writing this!
ReplyDeleteThere would be always two side of the medal. Here is https://econedge.org/2017/09/12/imperialism-case-study-of-nigeria-questions-and-answers/ an example.
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