Baring My Flesh
This past year has been the most exhilarating, frustrating, exciting,
humbling, and scariest of my and multiple “under-the-bed” books which will
never see the light of day, I released two novellas and a novel this year. Well,
two novellas, at least. Make Me Believe
came out in July, and “The life. After years of writing non-fiction tech books
and honing my fiction writing skills by way of fanfic Eighth Night” came out in
November as part of the Home for the
Holidays anthology. My novel, Stuck
with You, however, has been the most jinxed release I’ve ever
experienced—and that includes the Photoshop book that was released the day its
publisher filed for bankruptcy and the FrontPage book that had another author’s
name on the cover. Stuck with You has
been, in a word, stuck. Originally scheduled for release in October, it’s been stuck
with retail site bugs, formatting software bugs, and editors who bugged out. As
I write this, the book is once again Under Review on the retail sites and
should be live any minute now. I’ll believe it when I see it—you’ll probably
hear the cheers from your house when I do. And I’m sure the friends who’ve
listened to me threatening to quit and get a job as a bank teller will give a
sigh of relief.
Of course, the book going live is only the start. Putting
out a book is like undressing in front of someone for the first time. I want to
make a good impression. Is the book mechanically correct—is my underwear clean?
Is the story compelling—does my partner like what they see? Did I do justice to
my characters and bring the story to a satisfying conclusion—is this going to
be a one-time hookup or the start of a relationship? Did I do justice to the
LGBTQ community as a whole?
Wait, I’ve got a whole community riding on how I bare my
flesh—I mean, how I wrote this book? Of course not. But I do sometimes feel
like the whole community is going to judge whether I’m a worthy ally by how I
write my books and how I present myself as an author.
I’ve included LGBTQ characters in my work from the first
story I wrote for the Writing & Thinking Workshop my college required before
freshman year. Many years later, I started reading gay romance and realized
that I could write entire books about these characters and give them their own
happily ever after. That’s when I truly discovered my voice as a writer. Writing
male/male romance has made me a better person—I stand up for myself and take
more risks than I ever have before. I’m grateful to have the opportunity to
share my voice and experience this personal growth. At the same time, I’m not a
gay man, and as someone writing about a group of people I’m not a part of, I
feel a responsibility to tell these stories well and respectfully. If I do
those who identify with my characters a disservice, I expect to be called out
on it.
As someone who’s interacting with readers and fellow
writers, I also realize my personal behavior is being judged alongside my
words. I wouldn’t consider myself a worthy ally if I didn’t respect the
community, including those who show their rough edges in public. I don’t have
to like everyone or agree with what they say, but I’ll always defend anyone’s
right to speak up when they feel wronged by others, including those within our
genre.
I also hurt along with everyone else when someone takes
advantage of those in our community by creating false personas and accepting
gifts, money, and emotional support intended for someone who doesn’t really
exist. This is stealing. They stole from the readers who bought into their
lies. They stole from real wounded veterans, homeless young men and women,
people with mental illness—those who might have received those gifts and checks
from the generous readers who sent them to a fictional construct, instead. They
stole from authors, many of whom have felt compelled to disclose their real
names, ages, the gender of their cats, and what they had for dinner on the
night of October 14 (blood samples provided upon request) so as not to be
tarred with the same brush. And they stole from honest people who are now given
the side-eye when posting about their partners, special needs children, or even
their travel plans because selfish actors have caused mistrust of all. Given
how at home I feel in this community of readers and writers, I resented it the
first time my delusion that we’re all coming from a place of authenticity and
integrity was shattered. I resent even more that this is becoming so
commonplace that we now just give a heavy sigh and say we suspected as much.
As I bare my flesh—I mean, release my book—this week (please
let it go live this week and not become collateral damage in some bizarre
Martian takeover of the internet), I want to say thank you to K.A. Mitchell,
Felice Stevens, and Kade Boehme for welcoming me, offering advice, and
delivering kicks to the tush when warranted. You’ve become some of my closest
friends. And thank you to the gay romance community as a whole for giving my
voice an outlet. I hope my underwear is clean, all the naughty bits in place,
and that this is the start of a long relationship.
Author Bio
Jenna Kendrick writes male/male new adult and contemporary
romance, her favorite genre to read. She lives in Upstate New York,
where she spends the better part of the year trying to stay warm and
dry. When she's not writing, she reads, has lost count of the number of
times she's watched The Princess Bride and The Avengers, and drinks more
coffee and tea than she'd care to admit. She shares her home office
with her dog, Tally, and her cats, Loki and Tamiris.
Jenna spent most of her class time in high school writing bad poetry and short stories in which her teachers were the villains. She began writing in earnest in college, putting it aside for a few years to work as a teacher, paralegal, and product manager for several online services. In addition to writing fiction, Jenna also writes nonfiction technical books under another name.
Jenna spent most of her class time in high school writing bad poetry and short stories in which her teachers were the villains. She began writing in earnest in college, putting it aside for a few years to work as a teacher, paralegal, and product manager for several online services. In addition to writing fiction, Jenna also writes nonfiction technical books under another name.
Thank you for giving me a chance to contribute!
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