Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Wear Your Own Words

At one time in our lives we are victims of bullying. Maybe it happened when you were growing up by a sibling. Perhaps on the playground. Sometimes it happens later in life by colleagues. Of course there is the ever popular cyber-bullying where the predator is faceless.

Growing up I was poked at for being different, until I reached High School and life felt like it got a little better. As an adult my experience with bullies has come via the web. I used to write fanfiction, and that is where I heard the worst of the worst. It was also the reason I stepped away from writing in that venue and went elsewhere.

Each word dug a little deeper, each insult took a little piece of me. "Ignore it" people said to me. "Don't quit what you love, if you do they will win." First of all, I didn't quit what I love, I took it somewhere else. I did stay for quite some time. Fought the good fight, but in the end I was sore from the words that embedded themselves into my very soul. My heart hurt, and I was starting to resent the written word.

Do I look at it as quitting? Nope! I look at it as being brave. I took myself out of the line of fire in hopes to repair what I could. The scars will always be there, they will serve as a reminder that no matter where I am in my life, no matter what I do, what I write about or what I stand up for. There will always be someone who will try to shatter the pillars I stand on. Someone will try to demean me, and make my tales seem nothing more then dribble. My gender, my beliefs and my standards are on full display in the profession I hope to excel in.

I am sure if bullies all over the word were forced to tattoo the hurt they cause others, they would no longer see themselves in the light they so foolishly believe they stand in. A victim doesn't need to paint the words on their skin. It is there for all the world to see. In their sad smile, their pained expressions, and in the way they carry themselves. In short (well not really) do the world a favor. Wear the words you speak and write. It is in those words, you will define who you really are.

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